Garfield: Sheen Instincts
by ShakespeareHemmingway
Summary: Garfield talks to Charlie Sheen to save the show Two and a Half Men!


Garfield: Sheen Instincts

Garfield was in his room doing upsidedown pushups when Jon Arbuckle came to him in crying motion.

"Garfield there is horror news, Charlie Sheen is leaving Two and a half Men and it may not see the future days." Said Jon Arbuckle tears weeping of salty sadness.

"NO this cannot be, Two and a Half Men is Americas favorite show, without it America may crumble." Said Garfield with concern.

"What can we do Garfield, how can we save America." Asked Jon Arbuckle with hopelessness.

"I will go see Charlie Sheen and make him see reasonableness." Said Garfield, with voice of stern.

Garfield then hopped into his fighter jet, with lasagna logo, and saluted Jon Arbuckle as he put on his helmet.

"I am going under enemy lines, be sure to hold the home front." Said Garfield to Jon Arbuckle as he took off and flew into the sky.

As Garfield flew into the sky and sped along the clouds he noticed two shadows behind him. He was being followed!

"There must be vile enemy of America hoping to crush Two and a Half Men!" Said Garfield with disgusting rage.

"HAHA Garfield! We will stop you from talking to Charlie Sheen, then evil will rule world!" Said the enemy jets.

"You will rule the UNDERworlds!" Said Garfield as he dodged enemy fire and launched homer missiles at his enemies with super accuracy.

"NOOOOO." Said the enemy jets as they exploded into mushroom clouds.

With pesky enemies taken care of, Garfield continued to Charlie Sheens house. When Garfield arrived he parked his jet and went to the front door to knock.

"Knock knock this is Garfield I am in need of speaking sense to Charlie Sheen." Said Garfield with politeness.

Charlie Sheen knew it was Garfield and did not want to be convinced, so he rushed through the back door to his car for getaway escape.

"I will escape so Garfield will never find me!" Said Charlie Sheen in panic.

Garfield however saw Charlie Sheen escaping in his Car and knew what was up.

"You are damned fool Charlie Sheen!" Cried out Garfield to the sky fist clenched with rage. Luckily Garfield then saw a passerbyer driving.

"This is business get out." Said Garfield as he forced his way into the passerbyers car and kicked him out so he can pursue for maximum speed car chase."This just got real." Said Garfield as he sped off in pursuit.

Garfield put the pedal to the medal and reached maximum speed as he caught up to Charlie Sheen. Charlie Sheen saw Garfield and tried to lose him through traffic, but Garfield swerved effortlessly through traffic with top notch driving skills staying on Charlie Sheen like Glue on butter.

"It is time for final getaway." Said Charlie Sheen as he pressed a secret button in his car which gave him a turbo booster.

"Hasta la Visa Garfield!" Said Charlie Sheen with relief.

"Oh no he is escaping." Said Garfield with worry. All had seemed loss when Garfield heard a familiar voice.

"AMAKOOOOO." It was Jon Arbuckle Speeding from the opposite direction in a Hummer!

"You are not escaping to anywhere!" Said Jon Arbuckle as he crashed his Hummer into Charlie Sheens car, pinning him to a wall.

"Thank you Jon Arbuckle you are top notch vigilante catcher." Said Garfield with gratitude.

Garfield and Jon Arbuckle leaped out of their cars and ran to Charlie Sheen (Who had only small bruises and broken bones) taking him captive. They then took him to a secret warehouse where they could talk sense into him.

"Charlie Sheen you must return to Two and a Half Men, it brings joyousness to thousands of men women and children." Pleaded Jon Arbuckle with eyes full of tears.

"If not do it for me, do it for America." Said Garfield heart with love for his country.

"No, I want to pursue solo projects and become super movie star actor. I refuse." Pouted Charlie Sheen with stubbornness.

"Very well you leave us no choice." Said Garfield with sadness.

Garfield began to take something out of a closet which worried Charlie Sheen.

"What are madness you going to be doing?" Asked Charlie Sheen with worry.

"We have no choice, we must waterboard you." Said Garfield with Regret.

"NOOOO." Cried out Charlie Sheen with despairing shout.

"This will hurt you more than it hurts me." Said Garfield with heavy heart.

"Is there no ways other?" Asked Jon Arbuckle with concerned face.

"This is the only way to talk sense." Said Garfield with convinced eyes.

With these sad words Garfield began waterboarding Charlie Sheen with his waterboard for sake of patriotism and civilization.

"NOOOO THE PAIIIN." Cried out Charlie Sheen.

"Only after you see the rightness of Two and Half Men will pain be ended for good." Said Garfield with truth.

After 48 hours of waterboarding Charlie Sheen began to see the wrongness in his ways.

"Garfield you are right, I was a wrong stupid idiot to leave Two and Half Men." Said Charlie Sheen with realization.

"So are you of right thinking now?" Asked Garfield with wonder.

"Yes, Thank you for waterboarding me Garfield." Said Charlie Sheen with gratitude.

"No problem, I do what is best for you." Said Garfield with pride.

With these words Charlie Sheen went back to set for filming more episodes of Two and a Half Men for all to enjoy. Garfield and Jon Arbuckle were getting ready to head home when Garfields phone began ringing.

"Who is this?!" demanded Garfield with lightning energy.

"This is President Obama, I want you to come to White House so I can personally thank you for saving Two and a Half Men." Said President Obama on the phone.

"Very well we will go to White House for praise." Said Garfield hanging up the phone. Garfield and Jon Arbuckle flew to White House on Garfields Jet and landed on the lawn. President Obama was there to greet them with prizes.

"Thank you Garfield for waterboarding Charlie Sheen and saving two and a Half Men. America owes you much. Here is the medal of honor and the key to the city and a lifetime supply of lasagna." Said President Obama with gratitude.

"Thank you for these prizes but the lasagna will only be lasting 2 and a half hours." Said Garfield with witty jokes.

"HAHAHAHA." Said President Obama and Jon Arbuckle, laughing at Garfields wit. Garfield, Jon Arbuckle and President Obama laughed and laughed at Garfield's funny joke, knowing that Two and a Half men would be on forever.

The End??

Authors Note: If Charlie Sheen is reading this I hope he realizes his errors and will stay on Two and a Half Men for his own good and good of country.


End file.
